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Faking is Bliss…

By Azazel Eyes On March - 17 - 2009 ADD COMMENTS

“I had always wanted to be a doctor. But I could not be. My family faced serious troubles during the early days of my career. I had a sister to get married. My father had retired, and mother was illiterate. I was the only hope of food and survival for my family. I couldn’t afford to spend a long time studying. So, I took up a job. Today I will do my best to see that my son becomes a doctor.” “I always wanted to be a writer. But I could not be. Both my parents had sacrificed too much in life for getting me into the best school. They always ensured that I got the best of coaching. They got me admitted into the top medical college in my city. They saw to it that I had the best clothes and comforts. And for everything they had done for me, I wanted to make them happy by becoming a Doctor. I am one of the best and most successful professionals today. I have earned money and fame and my daughter seems to take a lot of interest in writing. I will see to it that she becomes a writer. I have the money, I can afford it.” “Daddy wants me to write. He says it must be in my blood. After all, that was what he always wanted to do. I love him so much, and I trust him. Today all I like doing is hair dressing. I wanted to be a hair dresser. But, I am sure dad knows better. If he says I am capable of writing, I must be. Only, I have to give it a little time. I will sure be a successful writer someday.” Does that sound like three generations of people from your family? Close to it?

Then you are a victim of the social and emotional entanglement that has been leading several generations of our community to dissatisfaction, in spite of enormous success and show they make. Every father looks at himself in his son. Every mother wants to guide her daughter through the career stride that she could never take. Is it just a mixture of an emotional mess and immense faith in parents, or an unsaid gratitude that a child feels he owes to his parents in return to all the favors he grabs in life? Every father wishes to provide his child with the best of options possible for him, with what he thinks is the best career option. Every child loves his parent. He assumes his responsibility to take care of his parents’ wishes from the very beginning of his career, even if it means saying a no to what he loved doing most. What both the son and the parent forget within this while is the fact that, neither of them gets complete satisfaction out of that career choice, in the end. The father assumes his son loves what he loves. The son believes that he loves what his father loves, even if he is not sure of it.

Furthermore, the college lecturers assume their idea of a perfect life as those ideal for every student. If they consider themselves successful, they owe it to their attitudes and preferences, and well if not, wish at least their students take up the paths they could not afford and be successful. All in good spirit, for the welfare of their students; who are like their own kids; forgetting the basic fact that they would be hated for forcing their choices onto a generation two times ahead of them. Ahead, not in terms of age, definitely, but ahead in terms of options and availability; in terms of thought, speed, strength, information and competence. Above everything we are a generation that can afford to risk; time, money (in many cases), work and thought. We can afford to leap into an option, check out if it works. Good, if it works, and else we would look for other options. Every young man/ lady graduates with options of a couple of jobs to take, or an average of 3 future- education options, very unlike the past generations which had to take up any single offer they would have had. We are strong and capable of facing tortures of financial turmoil in case of a brief failure. And what we expect in the end is a boost of confidence. Elders may as well keep quiet; we are not depressed about being encouragement-deprived. But sure, it bothers us to see principles from way down three generations trying to influence our lives today. What a 100 year old book of rights-and-wrongs says is of no significance to us today, but we realize that every single step we take is influenced by something vaguely of that sort.

Students of all streams of study alike, dislike attending classes, are bored of their subjects, love junk food, hate listening to preaching of moral science from ‘elderly knowledgeable wise HODs’, consider dropping out of college a possible-yet-impossible choice, wish dating was not as taboo as it seems, feel exams are a burden and think coloring their hair green is not a ‘bad- bold’ style statement. But, they never get to do any of these since they are considered ‘bad’ by the elders. If it is not the moral-ethical respect that they give to their elders that keep them away from their very wishes, it is the fact of fear that they might have to face the dirty circumstances of these wishes in some terrible form; they might get detained for bunking classes or they might be considered failures even by close family circles if they had dropped out of college. And definitely, it is the second fear that forces students to give up their happiness in most cases. It is the fear of depriving oneself of regards and respect from family and friends that keeps students from accepting that they dislike their subjects. The phobia of facing the questions of, “why did you take it up if you did not like it?” and further, the disgust that they cannot answer even when they know the answer as, “I disliked it after I took it up. What is wrong with it?” spoils the best years of the youth. “When we were young, we feared our lecturers. We wouldn’t walk past the principal’s office because of the respect we had for them. This generation of students doesn’t even know that they are not supposed to speak in their cell phones when the lecturer is around. They don’t give us the respect we deserve!” says a lecturer in an esteemed engineering college in the city. In answer to that a student remarked, “Respect is a thing to be earned. They hardly even regard us as human beings, and they say they deserve respect?” “I don’t attend classes, because i don’t like attending them,” said sri vani a ¾ student of engineering. When I stressed upon asking “why don’t you like attending classes?” she promptly said that it was just as natural not to like attending classes “… as not liking the color black. It is just a personal choice.

” Well yes, I was thinking… there are atleast 500 young students who enter every college for under graduation every year, according to the rule, each one of these 500 students MUST LOVE ATTENDING CLASSES to be doing ‘THE RIGHT THINGS’ in life. Isn’t that exactly what they claim? If managements expect students to be replicas of some imaginary ideal they had created for themselves a half-century ago, it is not our mistake! Why are we to suffer? If EVERY STUDENT meets their ideals and becomes what they had aspired to become, will there be quality in their work. will there be novelty and innovation? Will there be a scope of creativity, if what everyone produces is a result of the same brain-production-technique? The answer is definitely a BIG NO. Still people continue to force laws and rules on to the youth, with the excuse of directing them. It goes on that students hate the influence. They would be suppressed, their ideas would be suppressed. But it is okay, till the oldies are happy to be influential. AND IT IS SEVERELY OKAY, TILL THE WORLD DOESN’T WANT TO GET ANY BETTER. Since we all love obeying the rest, it is a happy life with no problems, but the problem that we are all dirty fakes. We fake, our parents fake, the lecturers fake. And we are all happy! Isn’t it happiness that we all live for?

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